Far Away
by samandjackshipper
Summary: Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.
1. Chapter 1 Four Months

Far Away

**Summary:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

**Chapter 1: Four Months**

There is NO Pete in this story. Pretend he doesn't exist.

Set in Season 7. (This story may not make sense at first, but believe me, it will soon. I promise!)

_**This time, This place, Misused,  
Mistakes, Too long,  
Too late, Who was I to make you wait** _

The sunlight streamed in through the thin curtains covering the windows, casting a warm glow over her soft features. She lay on the bed sleeping peacefully, her face bathed in the warmth the sunlight brought with it.

She stirred softly and opened her eyes slowly, closing them again against the light that her eyes had been deprived of while she slept. She brought her hand up to her face, running it through her short blonde hair, ruffling it more so than it already was and turned her head to look at the clock on the table next to her bed.

06:17 the green luminescent digits read against the black background. She never really slept late in the mornings these days and so sat up pushing the bed covers off of her slender body and walking to her adjoining bathroom.

She reached into the shower and turned on the faucets, setting it to the right temperature. As she walked past the mirror above the sink she stopped… she looked at her reflection in the mirror and took in her appearance.

Her blonde hair was messy from sleep, yet being short, it didn't look too bad. Her blue eyes and soft pink lips were contrasted against her slightly tanned skin. She couldn't really complain about her body, covered by a black tank top and shorts, she had a slender, toned body, yet there were scars, some barely noticeable but others that were defiantly apparent. Scars that had been sustained when…

"Honey there's coffee downstairs when you're up" she heard called from the other side of the door.

"Thanks" she replied. "Um, I'll be down soon, thanks Dad"

She pulled herself out of her musings and stripped herself of her clothes before entering the shower. She placed her face directly under the stream of water, letting the heat wash away the memories that were swimming inside her mind. 'She shouldn't wish her memories away' she thought to herself, 'memories are precious…. aren't they?' But these memories, these memories plagued her, made her feel hollow inside, and made her have flashbacks to when…

She looked up with a start as if someone had drenched her with cold water, yet the water that poured over her body was still hot. Trying to shake the thoughts from her mind she set about washing her hair. 

She had a lot to be thankful for… she was still alive. 'But what was worse… being dead or going through what she was going through now?' This was a question she had asked herself repeatedly over the last four months.

She stepped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a towel, trying not to think about the accident, the accident that had caused her so much grief and pain… not just physically but emotionally. She sat down on the chair in front of her dresser, staring at her reflection in the mirror once again.

This had become a common occurrence since the accident. She would sit for hours in front of a mirror, just staring at her reflection asking herself the same question over and over again, 'why am I here'.

A quiet knock on the door broke her out of her reverie.

"Honey, work called. They wanted to know if you could come in today? I told them you'd call them back."

"Okay, thanks, I'll call them back in a bit" she called to the closed door.

Her father's voice called out to her once more.

"Are you okay Kate?" 

"Yeah dad! I'm fine" she called out to him. 

'One hundred and twenty six days…' he thought to himself, as he threw his cell phone against the wall, shattering it into tiny pieces, yet the word that came out of his mouth was both offensive and blasphemous. Over four months and still… nothing!

He sunk to the couch behind him, placing his head in his hands running his hands through his silvery grey hair. She'd been missing for over four months… she could be anywhere. No-one had heard or seen anything relating to her whereabouts. Had no clue as to how she had simply disappeared.

She'd been missing before, but never this long, and the longer she was gone, the more he thought about the things he hadn't said, things he hadn't done. Over the past seven years on so many occasions they had both been so close to death… hell he HAD died, over and over.

Each time he had seen her again after fearing the worst, the promise he had made to himself, not to let rules stand in the way anymore, the promise he had made while either of them were either missing or on the verge of dying, went catapulting out of the window through fear that she didn't feel the same way about him.

But this was the longest she had been missing, and it scared him to the core. Wondering whether she was dead, or captive. Whether she was being tortured by a system lord or whether she was on a planet somewhere with no possible way of getting home. All he wanted to do was hold her in his arms, feel her body, taste her lips.

For over four months Jack O'Neill had woken up fearing that all of this was a terrible nightmare. That she wasn't really gone, but was safe at home, or on the base, working on some doo-hickey in her lab.

Sam Carter had been missing for over four months and every time he heard a knock at his door he had raced to it at the speed of light opening it, praying to whoever was listening that she would be there… but she never was. Every time the phone rang, he had hoped against hope she would be on the other end of the line. What he wouldn't give to hear her voice, to hear her laugh. Every time he walked into a room and saw her he felt… there were really no words for it. Whenever their eyes would meet it was the highlight of his day, just seeing those cerulean blue eyes that changed with her moods.

He'd tasted her lips on more than one occasion and he pressed his fingers to his lips as he remembered one particular time when he'd not only kissed her but held her in his arms, her arm around his neck, his tongue caressing hers softly, slightly desperately before the time loop started again. That was when he realised she had feelings for him. She could have just pushed him away but she didn't. She returned the kiss with equal vigour.

Okay so that wasn't true. The first time he realised his feelings for her were reciprocated was when those damned arm bands the Tok'ra had given them failed, and they were trapped either side of the force shield. He remembered trying to beat the force shield down and ignoring her pleas for him to leave her. When she had yelled at him, "sir just go!" he had screamed back "NO!" and in that instance he knew what he had been feeling ever since he had met her… it was love. As he had stared into her eyes he knew he'd rather die than lose her. 

But now, she was lost, and he had tried in vain to find her. Dr Frasier had told him he needed to sleep but how could he when his dreams and nightmares were plagued by images of her. Images that gave him the false hope that caused him to awaken believing it all to be a lie.

Daniel and Teal'c had come to see him countless times over the past four months, in amongst their own efforts to find Sam. Teal'c had been using his allies and contacts off world to find out of any news of Sam's location, and Daniel had been using his contacts on Earth. Jack was more of a 'do now, think later man'.

So he'd been the one out visiting every possible lead they got. Daniel and Teal'c had accompanied them on several of the visits, but a lot of the time they remained either off world in Teal'c's case or at the base, continuing to research leads encase this one was a bust like so many of them had been. 

After four months of erroneous leads, Jack couldn't bear to hear one more "Jack I think we may have found something", getting his hopes up only to have them shattered into a thousand pieces.

The one thought that had plagued Jack nearly every minute of every day for the last one hundred and twenty six of them was of the last time he had seen her.

_Walking into her lab he saw her bent over a microscope and his breath caught, as it did almost every time he saw her. She looked up as she hear him enter giving him a sweet smile before speaking,_

"hi sir, I thought you were off to your Cabin?"

"I am Carter, just leaving…last chance, land of sky blue waters, yada yada, you know the drill." He spoke with a sly grin.

"I'd love to sir, but I've got to finish this analysis of the naquadria samples found on P7X-489, sorry."

He gave a small laugh and hung his head, then looked up at her with a smile.

"Okay, okay, but I'm gonna get you up there one of these times Carter." 

She smiled at him and then spoke softly. "Next time sir."

"Is that a promise Carter?"

"Yes sir, next time I'll come with you". She took his hand in hers as if the physical contact were a sealing the promise.

He looked up from their joined hands at Sam and gave her a smile which she returned. It was a look they shared. One that only they knew what it meant… an 'I want you so badly but I know we can't' kind of look.

Knowing he had to get out of there, fast, he let out the breath he didn't realise he had been holding and spoke, 

"Okay",

and as he turned to leave she caught his hand in hers and pulled him back to her.

"I promise" she said tenderly.

He shouldn't let this physical contact go on much longer between them, but the feel of her hand in his made him want to grab her, pull her into his arms and shower her skin with passionate caresses of his lips. But he restrained himself.

Restraint had been something he had become damn good at over the past seven years. If they did a degree in it, 'mastering the art of resistance' he'd have a god damn PhD in it. When it came to Sam Carter, his restraint was pushed to the limit.

He turned to leave caressing her hand as he pulled away.

He had been beating himself up over that ever since he had found out she was missing. If only he had tried harder to make her come to the cabin with him, he could have protected her. Not that she really needed protecting. She could handle her own, something he had seen first hand, which lead him to wonder who could have so easily overpowered her that she was still missing. Her physical strength and ability to defend herself was something that would make most people gaze in awe… and yet, her intellectual strength was so far beyond that. She could fix almost anything, had used her intelligence to escape from so many captivity situations.

These qualities in her made Jack fear that something had happened to her which meant that her physical and mental strength was not enough to help her escape. Which lead him to fear to worst. Not that she was missing… but that she was dead. 

"No!" Jack spoke suddenly to the empty room. He couldn't think like that, the thought that she was alive and would come back soon was the only thing that was keeping him going. But the thoughts of never seeing Sam again, possibly finding out she had died seeped into his consciousness and before long he had headed to the drinks cabinet and grabbed the bottle of Jack Daniels despite it being only mid afternoon.

He poured a substantial amount, into the bottom of a glass tumbler and downed the fiery liquid. It burned his throat as it went down and the slight pain it brought with it made him ponder the thought of drinking more, to cause pain and also to make him try and forget what he had failed to do… how he had failed to protect her.

As he poured himself another shot the shrill sound of his house phone made him jump. He looked at the phone. 'Dare I answer it?' he thought to himself. He didn't know how much more he could take.

Although his heart ached, his hand reached out of its own accord and he picked up the phone.

"What?" his weariness was evident simply through his voice.

"Jack?" Daniel's voice came over the phone.

"Yeah, what is it?"

"I think I may have found something…"

"Daniel…"

"No, seriously Jack, this time I really think I may know where she is." 

"Daniel you've said…"

"Jack… please…. Just come down to the base."

"I swear to god Daniel if this is another dead end…" Jack left the sentence hanging.

Daniel was silent, knowing Jack wasn't finished.

Jack took a deep breath. "I just… I just don't know how much more of this I can take." He admitted. 

Daniel knew of Jack's feelings for Sam, and of her feelings for him. It pained him greatly to see his friend like this. When they had heard of Sam's disappearance, Daniel had seen the change in his friend, the growing weariness, the look of despair in his eyes when the leads they had followed had been a bust.

She'd been missing for four months and the last time Daniel had seen Jack he looked so different to the witty, sarcastic leader of SG-1 that he was so used to seeing. He was thinner and it seemed as though he had more lines on his face. The most evident feature of his despair was his voice. Whenever Daniel spoke to Jack it scared him, hearing the hopelessness in his voice. The hopelessness had really only developed over the last month. The determination that had been apparent at first ebbed away and now, that she had been gone for so long… Jack seemed to be loosing hope.

Daniel knew of Jack's invitation to Sam to come fishing with him, and realised that Jack blamed himself for Sam's disappearance. He blamed himself for not trying harder, not being there until it was too late.

"Jack, please… just come to the base. I really think this maybe it." He told Jack.

"Where is she…"

"You may not believe this… but she may be in England."

"England?!" 

"Jack, come to the base and I'll explain more." 

"Okay…I'm on my way." Jack hung up the phone and walked to the front door, grabbing his keys.

As he reached for the door handle he stopped. 'What if this really is another dead end?' he thought to himself. He mentally slapped himself. 'This was Sam… how could he not risk it?' He opened the door and jumped into his truck and sped out of his driveway to the mountain.

**_Just one chance, Just one breath,   
Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know, you know, you know…_ **

So... what do you think. It'll start to make sense in the next chapter (or possibly the third). Some of you may have already guessed what's happened. If you have, let me know! lol.


	2. Chapter 2 Decisions

**Chapter 2: Decisions**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

_**That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long** _

As Jack walked into Daniel's lab, the scientist looked up at his arrival. He didn't need to say anything, he could see the look in Jack's eyes begging him for good news.

"I honestly think we may have found her Jack."

Jack raised his eyes in a 'cut to the chase' kind of way.

"I have an associate in England who I met thought the Stargate programme and I keep in contact with her a lot and she um… she phoned earlier today to ask me whether I was in England."

Jack gave him another look that told him to get the part about finding Sam.

"Yeah, anyway, um, I told her I wasn't and asked her why she thought that and she told me she'd seen a member of my team in the hotel she was staying at for a conference. I asked her who it was…"

He took a breath, "she saw Sam Jack. I asked her whether she was sure and she said there was no doubt about it. It was Sam. She works as a liaison between our government and that of Britain and she'd seen pictures of all of us and she knew what Sam looked like and she said it was definitely her."

Out of all the leads they had followed, nearly all of which had been on other planets, none had ever actually said it was _definitely_ Sam. When they had shown the photo to the people who had given them the lead they always said something along the lines of… 'Well, I think that was her', or 'yeah she looked a bit like that', and none had ever been as sure as the lead that had been placed in front of them now.

Jack looked at Daniel, "You trust this woman?"

"Yes" he replied simply.

Jack took a deep breath, could this be the lead that would bring him to her? Prove to him that she wasn't dead?

"I'll be back in a minute, get me all the information you have on this lead." Jack yelled behind him as he sped towards the door.

"Jack! Where're you going Jack!"

"To get a flight to England"

So many questions were swirling around his mind as he sat on the plane from Washington DC to London, Heathrow. Every second he was getting closer to her… or was he. Was this going to be yet another bust? OF all the places this had been the most strange to him. Why England? Why a hotel? Why Earth?! She was part of the Planet's most elite top secret team who travelled to other planets on a weekly basis… why had whoever had taken her kept her on earth when there were countless planets out there, most of which had never been explored by the SGC.

These thoughts lead him to ponder the idea that whoever had taken her knew what they were doing. With so many planets out there, another country on Earth would surely have been the last place they would have thought of looking for her.

Jack was broken out of his musings by the announcement that they were only about 5 minutes from landing. The flight had gone by much quicker than he had anticipated, mostly due to the fact that he had been lost in thoughts and memories of Sam, forbidden thoughts and memories that could possibly be the only thing that he would have if he couldn't find her.

Anyone walking past him would have barely given a second glance to the man sitting in the black jeep parked outside the large rural hotel. They had no idea of the internal struggle that was going on inside of him.

Jack had been sat outside the hotel in his rented jeep for fifteen minutes and hadn't moved since he had arrived. Part of him was aching to go inside, to find Sam and wrap his arms around her… promise her that he would never let her go. But the other part of him couldn't bear to go though the agony and emotional pain of finding out the lead was another dead end.

He looked up from the steering wheel and surveyed the exterior of the hotel. Its white painted bricks and deep brown wooden framework. The hotel was a picture of quiet tranquillity with its colourful flower baskets hanging either side of the entrance and the window boxes full of more flowers.

He made up his mind and opened the door, stepping out of the car. It was now or never.

He walked up to the entrance and through the large oak doors. He lifted his sunglasses onto the top of his head and looked around as he entered. A large wooden staircase lead up to the first floor, the walls were covered with wooden panels along the bottom half and a royal, fir tree kind of green was the colour that adorned the top half of the wall. The place had an air of old-fashioned serenity about it and as he looked to his left he saw a large reception desk.

As he walked up to the counter he was greeted with a pleasant smile from the woman behind the counter.

"Good morning sir, how can I help you?"

"Yeah… um…" Jack took a breath as he pulled the picture of Sam out of the pocket on this inside of his jacket.

"I know you probably get a lot of customers here but… I was wondering if you'd seen this woman…" Jack unwittingly held his breath as he showed the woman the picture.

The woman looked at the picture and then up at Jack.

"She's not a customer…"

Jack almost felt his heart crack and the world around him seem to disappear. He wanted to break down and scream at the heavens begging them to tell him why he was being punished.

"…she works here."

Jack barely registered what the receptionist had said.

"I'm sorry?" Jack spoke, barely above a whisper.

"Yeah, she's a waitress here."

Jack looked at her and spoke, "are you sure… this woman…"

"Yeah, Kate Carter, she's been working here about two months."

Jack wondered whether this was what it felt like to step into the Twighlight Zone… this was NOT what he was expecting.

"She's working in the restaurant today if you wanted to talk to her."

"No…" Jack spoke suddenly. Something wasn't right here… it couldn't be the same woman…

He thought for a moment and decided he couldn't walk away, and yet, he couldn't just walk up to this woman who looked like Sam, well according to the receptionist AND Daniel's associate, when things were becoming more and more strange by the second.

Instead he asked if there were any tables free in the restaurant and decided that, rather than walking up to her he should see what was going on first hand.

The receptionist booked him a table and took him through to the restaurant. If was fairly busy, but not overly so and he was seated next to a window with a clear view of the room. She was nowhere to be seen and the woman left him with a menu and told him a waitress would be along to take his order shortly.

He looked at the menu, but did not see the list of foods upon it… he was too lost in trying to comprehend what was going on.

"Good morning", a female voice spoke to him. A female voice that made his heart skip a beat. He looked up and saw her standing over him smiling...

Sam Carter…

… and yet… the smile held no sign of recognition… no sign that she had even a slight clue as to who he was.

_**I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore** _

So… what do you think of that twist!


	3. Chapter 3 Overwhelmed

**Chapter 3: Overwhelmed**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

_**On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance  
'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand** _

Jack didn't reply… couldn't.

"What can I get you sir?" she spoke to him.

'Sir'…it wasn't said with an air of military protocol or necessity… it was said with politeness, and again held no sign of recognition.

The arrival of 'a customer on table six in the restaurant' was yelled into the kitchens, so she grabbed her pen and pad and went outside. She looked up and saw the gentleman sitting alone. He was tall, with a quite muscular build, his hair was short and silver and he was tanned. She walked over to him and greeted him with a 'good morning'.

He looked up and upon seeing his face properly, she felt an immediate attraction to him.

His eyes were warm and soft and his face held lines that she felt shouldn't be there… they were too premature. His eyes connected with hers and she saw shock overcome him.

He did not speak even when she asked him what she could get for him. She couldn't help it but she felt worried for him.

"Is everything okay sir?"

'Woah.' She thought to herself, she called every male customer, 'sir' , it was part of the job, and yet… with him, it felt different. Suddenly she felt a little light headed and spoke softly.

"I'll give you a few more minutes"

"No!"

She turned around at the sound of his voice. Oh god, his voice… it sounded so… beautiful… could you call a man's voice beautiful. The 'no' was filled with desperation and hope intermingled.

She couldn't help but wonder… 'do I know him?'

The accident four months ago that had nearly claimed her life, had left her with a brutal case of amnesia. She couldn't remember anything about her life before the accident. She remembered everyday things such as who the Prime Minister was, who the President of the United States was. She could recite the periodic table which lead her to believe that whatever her job was before the accident had been something scientific. Her family had been by her bedside the entire time… her mother and her father had brought her home with them afterwards and had tried desperately to help her regain her life. 

The problem was… she didn't remember her family. But she did not question that they might not be her family… they had been by her bedside in hospital and she wondered what would anyone gain from pretending to be her parents? They had told her, her name was Kate Carter and that was the only thing that had seemed real to her, her name.

Over the last four months she had never felt a connection to anyone who had entered her life after the accident that had claimed her memories. That was until now… this man in front of her made her fell warm... made her feel safe.

As he had said 'No' he had grabbed her hand, and she looked down at them… and for the first time in four months she remembered something. It was vague flash of a memory and yet she could see it… two hands interlocked, bathed in a blue light. One hand squeezed the other softy. She knew it was a memory of before the accident because she had never seen anything like it since.

She looked up at him again and looking into his eyes,

"do I know you?" she asked him quietly.

She saw a flicker of pain in his eyes... it was too much.

She turned and fled the restaurant and heard him call after her.

"Sam wait!"

She stopped and turned to him, the name sounded so familiar but it wasn't right, that wasn't her name… was it?

"My name's not Sam… its Kate." She didn't know why she said it, if felt wrong but she said it anyway. She had to get out of there so the turned and ran for the doors leading out of the hotel.

He didn't know what to do. When he had grabbed her hand and she had looked up at him he _knew_ he had seen something in her eyes.

And then he had asked him, "Do I know you" and he felt his insides constrict, what had happened to her to make her ask if she knew him, after everything they had been through.

And then she turned and left. He couldn't let her leave… not when he had only just found her. All he wanted to do was hold her but how could he when she didn't even recognise him.

He had called out to her, "Sam wait!" but she had turned to him and told him her name was Kate, and then left.

'No' he screamed internally, 'this wasn't happening, he wasn't going to lose her again.' So he ran after her.

Out in the car park he caught up to her and grabbed her arm spinning her round to face him… seeing tears marring her cheeks.

"I'm sorry I can't…" she spoke to him quietly while trying to run again.

"Please don't, I can't lose you again." Jack pleaded.

"This is too much… I feel like… I feel like I know you… but I don't… I… I can't remember."

"It's okay, please… just… don't run away." He spoke softly.

Hearing the desperation in his voice and seeing the fear in his eyes caused her to stop trying to pull away. He didn't remove his hand from her arm and yet… she didn't want him to.

"Okay." She whispered.

Jack relaxed slightly and what she did next shocked him, she pulled him to her into a firm embrace.

Jack wrapped his arms around her tightly, holding her close. Tears formed in his eyes as he realised that although it seemed like she didn't really know who he was, she felt like she knew him well enough to embrace him, and he revelled in the feeling of her in his arms again.

He ran his hand through her hair and whispered softly. "Its okay" and her arms tightened around him. The tears slipped down his cheeks and his voice choked as he whispered again, "It's okay".

When he had grabbed hold of her in the car park all she wanted to do was run but when he turned her to face him her heart begged her to stay.

She tried to apologise to him, and when pleaded with her, "Please don't, I can't lose you again." She felt her resolve crack and she tried to explain.

Looking into his eyes, she knew in that instance she could trust him and stepped forwards and wrapped her arms around him. When she felt him embrace her she felt safe and… she knew she knew him… she just didn't know how.

_**I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
'Cause you know, you know, you know…** _


	4. Chapter 4 Trust

**Chapter 4: Trust**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

(Chapter 1's layout has been edited... sorry!)

_**That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long** _

She pulled back slightly, while still keeping her grip on him. She had only met him all of ten minutes ago but in the four months since the accident she had never felt as safe as she did when she was in his arms. She felt a connection to him, something deep within her that made her feel protected, wanted, loved and something she couldn't put her finger on. She had never felt anything this strong even around her parents… which caused doubts to creep into her mind.

She looked into his eyes and begged him to forgive her, "Please don't hate me for this but… I don't even know your name…" She felt so guilty and embarrassed and she dropped her head, not ready to see the hurt in his eyes again.

He placed his hand lightly under her chin and lifted her face so he could look into her eyes.

"It's okay… I'm Jack O'Neill."

"Jack O'Neill" she repeated, and to her surprise the name slipped off her tongue with great ease.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have run away like that…" she spoke softly. "I was just overwhelmed, I could feel it inside, that I knew you somehow but I also didn't…I…"

"Hey, shh, c'mere" he spoke to her and he hugged her close once more, and all of a sudden she was assaulted with rapid flashes of memories…

_She was firing a weapon_

She turned to look

She saw him hit by a blast of some kind

He fell

She ran to him

Seeing him sitting on a bed with a bandage around his waist

Then he was standing before her looking at her with such love and emotion, she could almost see tears in his eyes. He was dressed in a black t-shirt and green trousers. He spoke softly, "c'mere" and enveloped her, moving his face into the crook of her neck as she hugged him back and looked to the heavens thanking god that he was alive.

She pulled back from him and reached for his white shirt and lifted it. She saw a fairly large round scar and she placed her fingers to it softly running them over the skin.

She looked up to see him staring at her with questioning in his eyes.

"I remember that…" she spoke barely above a whisper.

Jack softly raised his hand to her face, his thumb brushing over the skin of her cheek and up through her hair. That was when he saw it, a small stitched up scar on her hair line.

"What happened to you?" he asked her.

"I… I was in a car accident, four months ago…" she replied and saw anguish flit through his eyes. "I was okay physically, just… a few cuts and bruises, but…I couldn't remember anything of my life before the accident. The doctors told me I had a severe case of amnesia, and that I may never regain my memories."

Jack looked at her and he leant forward and placed a soft kiss to the scar. "I'll help you get them back… I promise."

"Where have you been all this time then?" Jack asked her.

"With my parents."

She saw confusion enter his eyes.

'That couldn't be right', Jack told himself. For one her mother was dead, had been since Sam was a teenager, and Jacob… well he was on the Tok'ra home world and had visited regularly over the past four months to aid in the search for his missing daughter.  
That meant that whoever she believed were her parents… well they couldn't be and he realised that what she thought had been an accident may have been planned and it scared Jack, wondering who would go to these lengths to take away Sam Carters memories.

He could think of a few people, several rogue NID groups, Adrian Conrad's 'lackies', people they had generally pissed off through their years in the Stargate Programme.

He looked at her and spoke softly, he needed to get her away from here, back to the safety of the SGC but he didn't want to scare her away, "I know we've only just met, well actually.. well, oh for cryin' out loud…" he saw her smile at that and wondered whether his remark had caused her to remember something.  
"Do you trust me?" he asked her.

She didn't reply for a few seconds but then she smiled softly and replied, "yes"

"Would you come with me…I mean… you don't have to… but I need you to… I can't…." 'my god' he thought to himself, 'when did I become such a babbling wreck?'

She placed her hands on either side of his face "Jack… I said I trust you." She reached down and took his hand in hers. "Now… where are we going?"

_**I keep dreaming you'll be with me   
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore** _


	5. Chapter 5 Safety

**Chapter 5: Safety**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

Okay, so I don't know when the Prometheus had the beaming technology installed but lets pretend it was before this

_**So far away  
(So far away)  
Been far away for far too long  
So far away  
(So far away)  
Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know** _

"I've just gotta make a phone call first… there are people who'll want to know you're okay." Jack smiled at her softly, his mind was spinning with the information it was trying to process.

She looked at him, her eyebrow raised in a gesture Teal'c would have been proud of.

Jack pulled out his new cell phone, his old one still in tiny pieces on his living room floor. He dialled Daniel's cell number and didn't take his eyes off her as he waited for him to pick up. He wasn't going to let her out of his sight, he was so busy taking in the sight of her that he didn't hear Daniel pick up.

"Hello?... Hello?"

"Sorry…" Jack spoke quickly as he was drawn out of his musings.

"Jack?"

"Yeah…"

Daniel had a feeling Jack had good news to tell him… it was clear in his voice, he could hear the difference… it was as though Jack had hope back in his voice.

"I found her." Jack smiled at Sam with a lopsided grin.

"What! Oh my god… is… is she okay?"

"It's hard to explain, but yeah… kinda."

"What's wrong?"

"I'll explain when we get back, I just wanted to let you know she's safe."

"Wait… Jack… Hammond told me to let you know that the Prometheus was back in orbit around earth… they could beam you straight here."

Jack pondered this bit of information, realising this would mean he could get her back to the safety of the SGC much faster.

"Um… okay, well, now's not really convenient."

"Okay, I'll call you back in a bit once I've alerted the Prometheus.

"I'll talk to you in a bit."

Jack snapped the cell shut.

"Who was that?" She asked him quietly.

"Daniel… we all work together." Jack decided to leave it simple, there'd be no point in telling her too much as he'd probably scare her away with the details of her real job. Part of him was grateful the Prometheus was going to beam them straight to the SGC, but part of him was worried that she'd be scared off. She had no idea who she really was and he was about to subject her to being beamed onto an alien ship. 'Maybe it'll help restore her memories' part of his brain told him, 'yeah, but maybe it'll totally freak her out' another part added.

"Can we go somewhere quiet." Jack asked her.

Under normal circumstances she would probably have declined, the whole 'going somewhere secluded with a stranger' scenario would have been brought up, and yet, these weren't normal circumstances and she didn't think of him like a stranger, she felt safe with him.

She reached out and took his hand in hers leading him towards the woodland surrounding the hotel. The feel of his skin against hers, his firm yet gentle grip made her feel protected.

They had been walking down a beaten track for about ten minutes, their hands interlocked. The sunlight streamed though the trees casting a dappled glow on the leafy ground below.

She stopped and turned to him. "Is this quiet enough?"

"Yeah." Jack told her quietly.

As she stood in front of him her fingers made small patterns on the skin of his hand.

"Can I ask you something…?" She asked him.

"Course you can…"

She looked around her, taking in a deep breath. She looked back and her eyes connected with his as she spoke, "Is there something between us… I mean, i… I can feel it, that I know you… but deep down, there's something else, I know I feel… feelings."

Jack was slightly taken aback by the last part, as he remembered saying something similar when they had both lost their memories before.

He took a breath before speaking tenderly, "that's something you need to remember on your own, I'm sorry."

Right then, any doubts she may have had about whether or not she could fully trust him were destroyed… he could have told her and for all she knew he could have been lying, but by telling her that she needed to remember on her own whether there was anything between them… he wasn't trying to tell her what to think.

She smiled, "Thank you…"

Her finger trailed up his arm and caressed lightly over his neck. She gently ran the back of her fingers across his cheek and up to delicately trace her fingertips over the scar across his eyebrow and he closed his eyes against the soft touch.

They had moved closer and he could feel her breath on his face and he was almost powerless against her, and his body seemed to take control over his mind as his hands started their own exploration of her, reminding him of the feel of her, her hands, her arms, her neck… his hands followed a similar path on her body as hers had on his.

His other hand went to the small of her back pulling her against him softly.

Her hand had now moved into his hair, as she ran her fingers through the short silver strands, their faces were mere inches apart.

Her fingertips trailed back down his face and across his lips, they were so soft, and Jack kissed her fingertips tenderly causing her to let out a breath and her eyes fell shut. She needed this closeness, this intimate, all consuming closeness, she felt complete somehow.

Her head fell back slightly and Jack cupped the back of her head with his palm, his lips just over her neck.

He heard her whisper, "Help me remember Jack…"

He spoke quietly, "I promise",

His lips brushed against her neck as he spoke, almost like butterfly wings and she had a flash of a memory,

_she was lying underneath him, her body was on fire… for him and his lips brushed against her neck_

His nose brushed delicately across her skin, a mere whisper as he moved his face to look into her eyes…

The sharp trill of his cell phone brought him back to earth with a resounding boom.

Absentmindedly he reached into his pocket and fished it out while still keeping his eyes locked with hers.

"What?" Jack spoke into the phone, shocked by the quietness of his voice.

"Jack, it's me. The Prometheus is ready to beam you on board, then they're gonna beam you directly into the infirmary at the base. Are you in a safe place?" Daniel told him.

"Yeah" he replied.

"Okay, they want you to keep your cell on so they can triangulate your position."

"They're gonna use GPS?!" Jack spoke with a hint of sarcasm.

"Hey… if it works!"

"Yeah, okay…" Jack replied then put the phone down to his side while still connected.

He ran his hand over her cheek softly and spoke to her with a gentleness that make her feel as though warm honey were running through her.

"Please don't be scared by what's about to happen… you've done this before."

She looked at him with questioning in her eyes. He wanted to tell her to close her eyes, but knew that if she had lost her memories, suddenly being in another place over the other side of the world may seem like another loss of memory to her.

"You're safe… I promise." He spoke with a confidence that showed her he was telling the truth, and he pulled her softly to him and she wrapped her arms around him. She nestled her head under his chin and he dropped a light kiss to the top of her head and whispered into her hair, "I promise you're safe."

Jack saw the white light engulf them, felt the familiar sensation of the demollecularisation that the Asgard beam did to their bodies in order to beam them from one place to another.

He tightened his grip on her, not tight enough to hurt, but enough to hold her to him securely. It wasn't as if he needed to, the beam didn't make you float in the air, but he wanted to keep her safe and by hell or high water he'd do anything to keep that promise.

**_I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
_**


	6. Chapter 6 Passion

**Chapter 6: Passion**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

**_And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore _**

She felt as though her body were vibrating, felt a tingling sensation deep within her. Her vision was being obscured by a bright white light Jack's arms were wrapped securely around her, her cheek resting against his chest and she could hear the beat of his heart and it calmed her slightly. Her hands tightened on his shirt.

Within a matter of seconds the scenery around them changed. She was no longer standing in the secluded, cool tranquillity of the forest… she was in a room full of people, a grey room with a single bed, and a circular wooden table.

Fear overtook her and she tried to run away, backing out of Jack's arms but he kept a hold of her speaking softly to her.

"hey, hey, hey… its okay… shh… I got you"

The other occupants of the room had no idea what was happening and they looked on in confusion as Jack tried to calm her.

"What was… where… what happened…" she was babbling, totally confused by what had happened.

"Guys can we have a few minutes?" Jack asked the other members of the room.

"Of course son. We'll see you in the briefing room when you're ready." Hammond announced and he left the room followed by Daniel, Teal'c and Janet.

Sam was still wrestling slightly to get away from Jack so he held her tighter and moved so he could look directly into her eyes but she refused to meet his gaze.

"Hey, it's okay… shh… hey… look at me, please" he begged her.

She didn't know what was happening but the desperation in his voice when he said 'please' made her calm for a moment and she looked into his eyes and saw the same look that had been there when he had held her in the car park.

Her breathing was slightly laboured from her efforts to get away and the feel of her heated breath on his face made his insides flare up.

"You're okay… you're safe… I promise" He told her, his voice barely above a whisper.

Te feel of his arms around her and his body pressing into hers caused her to remember the memory she had earlier, of her body underneath his, her desire for him.

They simply stared at each other, breaths intermingling… and then she moved… crushing her lips to his. The feel of his lips, they felt so soft, so warm.

Jack was startled at first, as Sam's lips met his and he knew he shouldn't return the kiss with things the way they were, but as her tongue traced softly across his lower lip… god help him… for Jack O'Neill was lost to Sam Carter.

She pushed against him and walked them both towards the wall where they crashed into it.

Jack's mouth worshipped hers, as if she were oxygen and he were suffocating. Desperation, desire and passion coursed though his veins.

Suddenly visions came to her, but they were blurry, she could not place the memories but she saw them…

As the slight vision of memories assaulted her, her hand flew out to clutch the headboard of the bed on its way, knocked the lamp from the bedside table and it crashed to the floor.

The sound bought them both back to earth with a crash.

Jack moved back and looked into her eyes.

"I… I'm sorry" Jack croaked out.

He turned to leave but she grabbed him. She crushed her lips to his again, it this time it wasn't filled with the lust and heated passion as before, but more of reassurance. She moved away from his lips after kissing him softly, their lips still touching and she whispered,

"I'm not…"

She kissed him again, so softly, so gently. "When you kissed me… I remembered things…" she spoke to him, her voice barely above a whisper. He was about to speak but she stopped him by bringing her fingers to his lips,  
"You promised you'd help me remember…"

Jack looked at her with a mix of sorrow, pain, desire and love. "We can't do this here" he spoke, his breath brushing across her fingers.

"Where can we go?"

Jack brushed the hair aside that covered the scar and he kissed it lightly like he had in the car park.

"Give me a few minutes… I'll be right back."

She nodded gently and he left the room.

**_Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore _**


	7. Chapter 7 Lies

**Chapter 7: Lies**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

As soon as the elevator doors closed he let out the breath he had been holding and slumped back against the wall of the elevator, his back hitting the hard metallic wall as he swept his hands over his face. 

He was an asshole… a grade one pure, foolish and idiotic asshole. How could he do this?! He cursed himself. He was taking advantage of Sam… but part of his brain forced its way through the mass of internal cursing and berating.

_But she wants you to… and remember what you saw… when you looked into her eyes._

Jack thought back to what had happened only a couple of minutes earlier. When he had pulled away from her, apologising and disgusted with himself for letting his desire and love for her overwhelm him… when she had kissed him softly and looked into his eyes, he had seen it… a small almost infinitesimal glimmer of the old Sam in her eyes… a flicker of recognition… but then it was gone.

He was so lost in his thought that he didn't even register the door opening to his floor. As the doors closed again with a thud, the sound brought him out of his reverie and he punched the 'open door' button and the doors parted for him.

As he walked towards the briefing room he made a conscious effort to straighten out his clothes before entering the room.

As he entered, four faces turned to him. Daniel was the first to speak.

"Jack, what's going on?"

Jack scrubbed his hand over his face and over the top of his head to the back of his neck where the interlocked and rested there as he replied.

"She doesn't know who she is."

The response he got was a mix of "what", "how", "I'm sorry?"… and a slight tilt of Teal'c's head and a raise of his eyebrow. Jack would have laughed if the situation wasn't so serious.

"LOOK!" Jack yelled suddenly.

They stopped speaking abruptly, all with shocked looks on their faces, but all silently demanding an answer.

"She's got amnesia, when I found her she thought her name was Kate and she was working as a waitress and she doesn't remember anything about her life before the accident."

"What accident son?" General Hammond inquired.

"She says she was in a car accident, but I'm not so sure." Jack replied softly. At their questioning gazes he added "she told me she had been staying with her parents… which we all know is impossible given that Jacob is off world and her mother died when she was a teenager."

"Colonel O'Neill, do you believe the NID is behind the amnesiac state of Major Carter?" Teal'c asked him.

"My thought's exactly T." Jack smiled at the Jaffa.

"Okay, look, I know you all have questions and just wanna see her, but she's kind of afraid right now… hell we arrived here by an asguard beam… she doesn't even know alien's exist. She just wants to get some rest… I think it'd be best if she went somewhere a bit more homely, just for the night till she's calmed down a bit…I was going to take her back to my house. If the NID really are behind this I want to keep an eye on her and if they find out that _we've_ found her the first place they'll probably look is her house… that's all with your permission of course sir?" Jack directed the last part at the General.

"That's probably a good idea Colonel. I'm giving SG-1 a week's leave effective immediately. I know you've all been working tirelessly on finding Major Carter. Get some rest guys"

"Um, with your permission sir's I'd like to run a couple of tests on Sam before she leaves. The sooner I can run the tests, the sooner we may find out what happened to her."

"Okay Doctor, Colonel, will you accompany Major Carter down to the infirmary."

Janet could see the worry on Jack's face. "Colonel, if she really doesn't want to come down I can wait a few days, but I think it's for the best.

Jack sighed, "I'll talk to her".

Jack knocked lightly on the door before opening it. When he walked in he saw her sitting on the edge of the bed, her eyes fixed on an imaginary spot on the floor. He walked quietly over to her and sat next to her on the bed. He placed his hand on the small of her back and spoke softly,

"hey"

She whispered her reply, "hi", and looked up at him. "Are we leaving?"

"Soon, I promise, but first… Doctor Frasier, Janet Frasier, she wants to run a couple of tests, just to make sure you're okay."

"Do I have to?" She asked.

Jack smiled softly. "I think it's for the best. The sooner we get these tests out of the way, the sooner we can get you outta here"

"It'll be okay, I promise."

She looked into his eyes and nodded silently. 

As she entered his house, she felt a sense of warmth overcome her. After having her blood taken and an MRI scan performed by a Doctor called Janet Frasier, she had been allowed to leave. Janet had seemed so friendly, and so caring (much more so than the doctors and nurses at the hospital after her accident. She felt a sense of familiarity with Janet and that she owed the doctor a lot.

Jack shut the door and guided her into the living room, "Uh, make yourself at home, I'll… I'll go put some coffee on".

"Okay" Sam smiled at him.

As Jack left she stepped down the last step into the living room and took in her surroundings. The place was cosy, a large fireplace at the centre of the room which held photo frames atop of it.

She walked over to it and looked at the one at the centre and what she saw made her smile. In the frame was a photo of herself and Jack, and two other men who she recognised as being the ones she had seen earlier. A tall muscular, bald African-American man with what looked like a gold tattoo on his forehead and another man with brown hair, glasses and a friendly face, both of whom stood next to her and Jack. They were all smiling, but what gave her goose bumps, the ones that make you go all tingly inside, was the fact that she and Jack were laughing. She felt warmth seep through her and she closed her eyes at the sensation.

She moved around the room taking in every detail she could in the hopes that it would help her remember. She saw box sets of a TV show she had come to love in England called 'The Simpsons', and saw photos of Jack and other men in US Air Force uniforms in other photos, photos of Jack's life.

She walked past the sofa and saw more photos… but then she stopped… and what she saw made her blood run cold, made all the warmth seep from her. Her hand started to shake as she reached out and picked up a photo frame. In the picture, Jack had his arms around a woman and a young boy, no older than eleven. She saw the rings on Jack and the woman's fingers and just by looking at the boy she could tell he was Jack's son. She looked up and saw another photo of the boy on the shelf.

'How could he do this to her' she thought. Tears started to well up in her eyes. 'How could he lie to her… he had a wife!?' Her fingers became limp and the photo frame slipped from her grasp to land face down with a soft thud on the sofa cushions as she ran for the door.

Jack was filling the coffee maker with water when all of a sudden he heard a slam and realised it was the front door. He raced into the living room and couldn't see Sam anywhere. As he turned for the front door he was distracted by a shiny object on the sofa. He turned and his breath hitched in his throat. Carefully he picked up the photo frame and turned it over.

"Shit" he cursed and ran for the front door.


	8. Chapter 8 Feels Like Rain

**Chapter 8: Feels like Rain**

She could feel the pulse of her blood as it coursed through her veins. She had slowed from a run to a brisk walk as she had gotten further from the house... from his house… from him.

'How could I be so stupid?!' she spoke internally to herself.

The tears that fell from her eyes slipped down her cheeks as she wept, her breathing heavy and not from the running. She thought she had found someone who she could trust, someone she really knew… someone she _felt_ she knew… but it all turned out to be a lie. He had a wife and a son and here he was kissing her and telling her all sorts of things.

'Oh god… what if we were having an affair… what kind of person am I?' She stopped walking and clutched at her stomach. She felt pain deep inside her. She had no idea who she was and the first person she felt a true connection with had lied to her. 

She barely registered the rain as it fell from the heavens, hard and heavy, beating against the pavement and within minutes her clothes were soaked through. 

His neighbour had been putting the trash out as Jack bounded from his front door.

Jack skidded to a halt in front of him. "Evening Jack, scaring off the ladies are we?!" Ben Richards smiled at him.

"Which way did she go Ben?" Jack spoke quickly.

"Towards town, she was running pretty fast, you'd better hurry." Ben told him.

"Thanks" Jack said as his feet pounded on the pavement towards town.

He didn't know how long he'd been running when the rain started but he didn't care. All he cared about was finding Sam and keeping her safe.

He squinted through the rain ahead of him and he slowed as he tried to get oxygen into his starved lungs, trying to make out the figure ahead of him, the black spots that raced across his vision didn't make it any easier. That and the fact that the figure was bent forward.

The figure slowly stood upright again… there was no mistaking that mass of blonde hair. He ran towards her.

As she stood up and placed one hand over her face, crying silently, someone grabbed her and spun her round. She looked up to see him standing in front of her his face shiny from the rain that covered it, his clothes darkened by the water that had soaked through them.

"NO! LET GO OF ME! YOU LIED TO ME!" Sam cried.

"NO I DIDN'T!" Jack yelled to be heard over the rain. "I KNOW WHY YOU RAN AWAY… YOU SAW THE PICTURE…"

"YEAH, I SAW THE PICTURE! YOU WITH YOUR WIFE AND SON! WHAT WERE WE HAVING AN AFFAIR!? WERE YOU CHEATING ON HER WITH ME?!"

"NO! I HAVEN'T SEEN SARA IN YEARS… WE'RE DIVORCED!"

"what?!" Sam spoke with disbelief.

"We're divorced… have been for years… and my son…" Jack stopped and took a breath. "… he… he's dead."

She stopped and breathed heavily. She wanted to speak but her eyes conveyed it all.

"I never lied to you." Jack told her through the rain. "Everything I told you is true."

Sam was crying again. She was a fool, she'd automatically assumed he was a liar, even though her heart told her he wasn't, but her head had won and she'd left without even trying to talk to him.

Now as the rain beat down on them she felt like such a fool.

"I'm sorry" she whispered.

Even through the rain he heard it.

"You don't have to be. Please, I would never lie to you. I promise."

Suddenly he moved forward and grasped her face in between his hands and captured her lips in a heart searing kiss. Both were oblivious to the rain as she leant into him wrapping her arms around his neck.

He broke the kiss gently and rested his forehead against hers.

"Lets get you inside." He whispered. Her reply was a gentle nod. He had taken off without a jacket so as they walked back to his house he kept her as close to him as possible, her head resting on his shoulder.


	9. Chapter 9 Remembering

**Chapter 9: Remembering**

They were standing in the hallway of Jacks house, the rain lashing against the windows as Jack moved up slowly behind Sam after he had closed the door behind them.

"Let's get you into some dry clothes" he told her softly and led her to the bathroom.

He disappeared into his adjoining bedroom as she stood in his bathroom looking around the room, trying to see if anything seemed familiar. 

Jack returned with some black sweat pants and an old air force t-shirt.

"Sorry" he mumbled, "these were all I could find." He spoke quietly to her as he placed the clothes on the chair by the bath tub. He moved up behind her, worried by her silence and gently touched her shoulder.

She didn't jump, but closed her eyes at the sensation his touch caused. Her shirt was clinging to her like a second skin and she could feel the warmth of his hand radiating through her chilled body.

"God, you're freezing. You should have a hot shower or…" Jack started to moved his hand as he moved to turn the shower on, but her sudden, quiet cry of "No!" stopped him.

Her body remained facing away from him but she turned her head to him. She took his hand and gently pulled it back to the place he had touched her last, and then began to move his hand gradually down her arm.

Jack looked into her eyes and understood and as she tentatively removed her hand, he continued his caress down her arm. He moved behind her so their bodies were pressed softly together, his front touching her back and as soon as she felt him move around her she moved back into the touch of his body. Jack's other hand trailed softly down her other arm, his fingers caressing the skin beneath them.

She felt warmth wherever he touched and as his hands reached hers he ran his fingers across the back of her hands and in between the digits, his caress provocative and yet _so _gentle. He interlaced their fingers, and she moved his hands. She moved his left hand so it trailed across her stomach and under her shirt. She moved her other arm up her body so that her hand played idly with the hair at the base of his neck, caressing the skin there then gasped softly as a memory assaulted her.

_she was kneeling in front of him, dressed in black, he was in a tight white t-shirt with a pale blue shirt over the top, their kisses passionate as the were desperate, his hand moving to her face to cup her cheek… _

Her head fell back against his shoulder and she then turned in his arms and divested him of his shirt.

Jack broke the kiss but only moved back a few centimetres. "Are you sure you want to do this? I'd die if you wake up tomorrow hating me for it"

"I'm sure… and I know… the one thing I know _without a doubt_ is that I could _never _hate you. You're the one person I trust, the one I feel I know… have a connection to... I feel it in my heart." She whispered softly to him.

He manoeuvred them toward the bedroom and fell towards the bed. As they lay there, Jack stopped and looked down at her and closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry… I can't…" Jack apologised.

"Why?" She asked, confused.

"Because I want our first time together to be… when… well, when you know who you are…I'm sorry." Jack brushed a strand of hair away from her face.

She smiled up at him. "Thank you… I now know I really can trust you."

Jack kissed her lips softly. "We'll find another way of getting your memories back. I promise."

They lay together Sam's head resting under Jack's chin while Jack was languidly running his fingers through her hair while his other hand held Sam's securely in his, their fingers interlaced. He hadn't fallen asleep. He was contented to watch her sleep. The way her body moved when she breathed in her sleep, he way her lips moved.

Suddenly she sat up, scaring Jack half to death.

A rush of visions came at her…

_Walking into the briefing room meeting his eyes for the first time_

She was dressed in a blue dress and he told her she 'looked great'

Throwing him on the bench in the locker room and kissing him deeply

Him holding her and running his hand through her hair telling her 'It's alright… we're going back'

Him leaning over her caressing her face

Holding his hand when the alien device had impaled him to the wall

Sitting together by a fire

Him holding her with his hand over her mouth to stop the enemy Jaffa finding out their position when she cried out in pain

Hugging him after he had killed Hathor and not been taken over by the Goa'uld

Watching Jack kiss her duplicate through the mirror

Jack trying to stop them taking her on the hell planet and being shot for his actions

Telling Janet she missed him

Begging him to save himself

Watching him on the other side of the force-shield as he yelled at her that he wouldn't leave her

Cuddled up to him in the underground facility where they believed they were miners.

Jack finding her strapped to the medical bed as they were about to kill her

Nearly drowning together.

Not giving up on finding him when he was stranded off world

Crying because she couldn't bear to lose him

Jack asking her to go fishing four months ago and the touch of their hands as she promised him that next time she would go.

Him… Jack O'Neill… the one man she loved most in this world. The man she would die for 

Jack held her, asking if she was alright, and telling her that she was safe.

Suddenly her eyes snapped open and locked immediately with his.

"Oh god… Jack…" she let out a breath, tears now falling from her eyes. She reached up and ran her thumb over his lips.

"…I remember."


	10. Chapter 10 Believing

**Chapter 10: Believeing**

**Author's Notes:** Sam's been missing for four months. Jack blames himself and after countless unsuccessful leads, he is beginning to loose all hope of ever finding her.

Jack could barely believe what he had heard, part of him not wanting to believe it for fear that his mind was playing tricks with him. 

"Sam…?" Jack spoke breathlessly.

"It's me Jack… I remember…" she whispered as the tears fell from her eyes. She crushed her lips to his in an effort to reassure him that she was telling him the truth.

"I promise it's me Jack…" she spoke into his mouth, her hand running through his short hair at the nape of his neck, the other cupping his cheek.

"Oh god… please don't let this be a dream" Jack breathed against her lips.

"Oh god Sam, I thought I'd lost you… I though you were…" Jack could barely finish his sentence… the word 'dead' stuck deep in his throat.

"hey… shh, it's okay…" Sam placed feather-like kisses to his lips as Jack pulled the duvet back over the top of them from where it lay after Sam had bolted upright without warning.

"I promise, I'll never let you go." He whispered to her, running his fingers through her hair.

They lay in blissful silence for about five minutes before Jack spoke and Sam could heard the raw emotion in his voice and knew he was holding back tears.

"I'm scared Sam."  
She turned her head slightly to look into his eyes, but he did not meet her gaze.

"What of?" She asked quietly.

Jack took a shaky breath and closed his eyes.

"I'm scared… that if I go to sleep… I'll wake up… and all this will have been a dream. I've… I've dreamt of this for so long, needing you in my arms. Sometimes I woke up believing the dreams were real… and then… when I realised…"

Jack put his hand to his face covering his eyes, doing everything within his power not to let the emotions get the better of him.

"Hey… look at me… please Jack…" Sam spoke softly and pulled his hand from his face. She brought his hand to her lips and kissed his palm softly and she met his eyes and could see the pain within them.

Sam manoeuvred herself so she was sitting up and looking down at Jack. She ran her hand softly down his face.

"This is real… I'm here… I'm not going anywhere…I'm yours and I'm never going to leave you… I promise. Whoever did this to me… the NID, the Goa'uld… I don't know, but we're together now, and I know deep down that together we are stronger… I'm yours and _no-one _is going to take me away from you again… because I care about you…" she gave him a sweet almost sly smile before adding "… a lot more than I'm supposed to."

She smiled at him and leant closer and whispered "I love you Jonathon O'Neill", before kissing his lips with gentleness and passion.

"I love you Samantha Carter… always and forever…" Jack returned the kiss and held her close to him.

She pulled back a few inches and spoke softly.

"We don't have to sleep yet… I wanna… I don't know… walk with you… talk… sit on your roof and look at the stars… we can sleep later." Sam offered.

"I like that idea… why don't we drive to yours get you some clothes and then go get take out?" Jack smiled.

"Okay…" She placed a kiss to his lips and they got dressed (Sam in the sweats and air-force t-shirt Jack had brought to her earlier) and left the house.

They got to his car and Jack opened the door for Sam and she slid in positioning herself in the passenger seat. She didn't take her eyes off him as he walked round to the driver's side. Jack didn't take his eyes off her either, even when he clipped the front bumper of his jeep which caused him to curse quietly and Sam to giggle.

Oh the sound of Sam's laughter… it made his insides feel warm and fuzzy and he slid in the driver's seat next to her. As he turned the ignition on Sam spoke quietly…

"wait…" she smiled and leant over and placed a long, drawn-out kiss on his lips, her hand stroking his face as she did so. Jack's hand slid around to her neck, his thumb stroking just under her ear as he returned the kiss with equal vigour.

She pulled back and let out a breath "mmm… now we can go."

Jack laughed and reversed out of the driveway and set off towards Sam's house.

Half way there Sam let out a gasp. "Daniel… Teal'c! Are they ok? I… I didn't…"

"It's okay… give 'em a call from my cell. They'll wanna know you're back to you ol' self." Jack smiled and handed her his cell phone from his pocket.

Sam dialled Daniel's number and after a few rings it picked up.

"Jack… is everything okay?"

"Hi Daniel…" Sam spoke into the phone.

"Sam?! Oh my god… it's you… you're… you?! When… what… h…how?!" Daniel yelled happily into the phone.

Jack laughed at the man's babbling.

"Yes, its me. I remember everything." Sam smiled.

"okay… where did we first meet?"

"On Abydos… it was my first mission through the gate." Sam answered.

"Hang on a second Daniel." Sam put her hand over the receiver and spoke to Jack.

"Shall we meet Daniel and Teal'c somewhere for dinner?"

"Yeah, how about O'Malleys?" Jack suggested. 

"Besides, the company will help keep us awake." She whispered.

"Daniel?" Sam spoke into the phone.

"Yeah?"

"Do you and Teal'c want to meet Jack and I at O'Malley's in, say, an hour? See if Janet and General Hammond can come too." Sam asked him.

"Sure, we'll be there. Oh and Sam… it's so good to hear your voice again." Daniel told her.

"Thanks Daniel. See you soon. Bye" Sam clicked off the phone when he said goodbye.

Sam handed the phone back to Jack and he put his arm around her as he drove and she willingly snuggled up to him and let out a contented sigh.

"This is perfect."

"Mm, I know what you mean." Jack smiled and kissed the top of her forehead.

An hour later and after stopping at Sam's house for her to have a shower (for which Jack joined her) and change clothes they were strolling across the car park and into the restaurant.

As soon as she entered she spotted Daniel and Teal'c seated at a booth across from the door and Sam couldn't help the giddy smile that adorned her features as she hurried across the restaurant towards them.

Daniel scooped her up in a hug and kissed her on the cheek. In the four months that he had been missing it felt like he had lost a sister because that was what Sam felt like to him.

"We thought we'd never see you again." Daniel told her.

"I know" Sam let out a breath. "I'm just glad I'm back."

As Daniel let go of her Teal'c surprised her by enveloping her in a bear hug.

"You have been sorely missed Samantha Carter… are you alright?" Teal'c asked, the sentence seeming stoic but filled with much devotion, admiration and friendship, for like Daniel, it had seemed like he had lost a sibling. Each member of SG-1 felt like a brother (or in Sam's case a sister) to him and he would die for any of them. It had also pained him greatly to see Jack in so much despair and grief when she was missing.

"I am now Teal'c… thank you." Sam smiled.

They all sat at the table, Jack letting Sam slide in the booth fist then sitting next to her, while Daniel and Teal'c took up seats opposite them.

After ordering food and drinks they all sat talking like Sam had never gone missing, all of them deciding that topic of discussion should be left for tomorrow and to just try to get back to normal for the night.

Tomorrow they would set about finding out who had taken Sam and for what reasons.

About an hour after they had arrived Sam excused herself to use the bathroom.

"Okay, but if you're not back in three minutes I'm coming in to get you, and I don't care how many female's I get screaming insults at me when I do!" Jack told her with a grin.

"I'll be fine." Sam smiled and Jack watched her leave and she turned to smile at him again as she walked in the door.

He didn't take his eyes off the door that lead to the women's bathroom the entire time she was in there. He let out a breath he didn't even realise he had been holding when she walked out again a few minutes later and back towards the table.

She held out her hand and spoke softly. "May I have this dance?"

Jack grinned and let out a soft laugh as he took her hand and he lead her onto the wooden dance floor where a soft, smooth jazz piece was playing.

Daniel and Teal'c watched them dance with soft smiles on their faces and as the waitress came over to ask if they wanted more drinks, she temporarily blocked their view. When she left again what they saw didn't shock them at all. Sam and Jack were engaged in a passionate kiss on the dance floor, totally oblivious to their surroundings.

Daniel smiled. "It's about time."

"Indeed." Replied the Jaffa with a small nod of his head.

Outside O'Malleys, Jack stood behind Sam, his arms wrapped around her keeping her warm.

"Do you guys wanna come back for a couple of beers maybe a couple of games of poker or somethin'?" Jack asked.

"Sure you guys don't wanna be alone?" Daniel asked with a sly grin.

Sam and Jack both laughed, "It's fine… poker and beer sound like a great idea." Sam told them.

"Okay, well let me phone Hammond and Janet, they'll want to see you. They should have finished by now." Daniel told them. He had informed them earlier that George and Janet had desperately wanted to come to see Sam now that she had her memories back, but were unable to leave due to an off-world mission ending badly and several marines coming back severely wounded.

"Alright, you'll follow us?" Jack asked.

"Sure." Daniel told him and they parted ways toward their vehicles.

Jack reversed out of the parking space and pulled up just beside Daniel who was still talking on the phone.

Jack pressed the button beside him to open Sam's window and yelled across to Daniel. "Come on Danny-boy!"

Daniel covered the mouth piece and yelled back. "You go, we'll follow in a few minutes."

Jack laughed and sighed. He pulled out of the restaurant car park and set off down the road. A few minutes later he rolled to a halt at a set of traffic lights.

Jack reached over and took Sam's hand.

"You okay?"

She turned and smiled at him. "Perfect."

Jack brought her hand up to his lips and his eyes flicked to the lights above them… 'still red'… and placed a kiss to the palm of her hand.

Then without warning…

_smash _

_the sound of metal on metal _

_glass shattering _

_glass flying _

_Sam screaming _

_darkness _

OH NO… it's not over yet!

Mwahahahaha!

(AN- I just edited it slightly. The traffic lights are now a few mins along the road… not directly outside the restaurant)


	11. Chapter 11 Confrontations

Jack's car was sitting at the traffic lights and within a split second there was a nauseating crash of metal on metal as a car smashed into it at high speed on the driver's side. His car was thrown across the street and flipped onto its side, glass flew everywhere and bits of metal were hurled into the air.

Sam wasn't fully unconscious when the car finally stopped moving. It had been flipped onto it's side when it was impacted and she was nearest the road. She felt like her world was spinning and she managed to lift her head slightly from where she was slumped against the door. She couldn't really comprehend what was had happened, she felt disoriented and like she was ready to pass out but as she slowly tried to pull herself together her first coherent thought was of Jack. She turned her head slightly and saw him slumped in his seatbelt, his body limp and hanging towards her. It seemed like the seat belt was the only thing stopping him falling out of the seat and on top of her. She tried to speak but found she couldn't. She tried to call out to him, call his name, ask him if he was alright, anything. She was screaming at the top of her lungs but no sound came out, only a hoarse whisper.

Her right arm was trapped underneath her weight and she could barely move because the seatbelt was so tight. She tried to move her other arm and just about managed to twist her left hand to unbuckle her seat belt but it wouldn't move because it was too tight. She thrashed uselessly in the seat, the accident leaving her shocked and clumsy. Tears began to fall down her face as she had flash backs to the car crash that stripped her of her memories… but she knew who she was… she knew where she was, knew the man beside her… her lover… her Jack.

She stopped, took a few deep breaths and managed to calm herself slightly. She pulled her right arm free cutting it on a piece of broken glass as she did so, but barely registered the pain due to the adrenaline coursing through her system. Managing to pull some slack into the seatbelt she pressed the release button again and it unclicked causing her to fall forwards.

She immediately looked up at Jack and tried to kneel, sit… anything to be able to get to him. She looked at his side of the car. The impact seemed to have wiped out most of the back of the car and had caused a massive dent in the front (nothing compared to the back) and caused the glass in every window to shatter.

"Jack" Sam tried to call to him, but her voice was hoarse. She reached up to him and felt for a pulse… she could feel something but didn't know if it were really a pulse due to her hands shaking so much.

She was just freeing him from the seatbelt when she heard glass smashing and strong arms wrapped around her waist that started to drag her out of the broken windscreen. She felt the release on his seatbelt give and she managed to break Jack's fall to where she had previously been kneeling and could have sworn she heard him groan her name before she was pulled completely free of the car.

She tried to fight the arms around her managing to finally find her voice and yell at them to stop.

"No… no… I have…back… no…Jack."

She finally managed to scream, "JACK!"

"You're not going anywhere… major." A cold voice whispered into her ear.

She turned her head slightly as much as the pain in her neck would let her and saw a burly man with a gun placed against her forehead. She though she recognised him, but pulling her from the car and hauling her upright had caused her head to spin and her eyes to become blurry.

"You got away from us once… you won't get away again."

The pain in Jack's head felt like a sledgehammer and he ached all over. He had shooting pains along his left side and he could barely move his left arm. Everything was blurry but through his semi-conscious state he heard her… herd Sam scream his name and suddenly the haze cleared enough for him to decipher where he was… and that Sam wasn't there.

He turned his head and saw his windscreen smashed to pieces and he moved his right hand slightly to put his weight on it and felt coldness. He glanced down and saw he had put his hand on the concrete of the road that lay underneath him through the smashed passenger side window. He glanced out of the windscreen and saw her… Sam…and then he saw the gun.

"No" he whispered more to himself than anyone else. He moved himself around to try and get to his dashboard compartment and retrieve the gun he kept in there but only really having the use of his right arm made that difficult. He managed to pull it open and fished inside for the gun.

Manoeuvring himself from inside the car and out of the windscreen took more effort than he thought and he ended up tumbling out and landing on his side with a groan.

"Sam", Jack called out to her as he tried to get to his feet.

The only thoughts running through his mind were of how he had promised to keep her safe, how he had just gotten her back, how much he loved her.

Jack kept the gun held in his left hand as best he could with what little motor functions his hand was allowing from that arm and pushed himself up from the street. It hurt to move and as he stood he did so almost crouched trying to relieve the pain inside him… pain that right now seemed more emotional than physical.

His back was to Sam and her captor and he switched the gun to his right hand and suddenly turned to face them, gun pointed at him.

"Ah ah! Colonel… I don't think that's a very good idea do you? Wouldn't want me to blow your girlfriends brains all over the street now would you?" The man said cruelly.

She tried to shake her head to remove the haze that partially obscured her vision. Her vision cleared enough for her to see Jack emerge from the wreckage of his SUV. She took in Jack's appearance, blood trickled down the side of his face from somewhere atop of his head, there was blood staining his shirt and his left arm seemed broken by the way he was holding it against himself.

Sam tried to twist her head while her captor's attention was on Jack. Upon seeing his face a flash of a memory came to her. The man holding her was one of the doctors who had been treating her when she was first diagnosed with the amnesia.

"Dr… Dr…Bennet?"

"Oh you remember me… I'm touched" he spoke sarcastically, then his voice dropped "…that was my cover-up Major."

"Let her go!" Jack yelled from across the street, his fingers still wrapped around the gun, his feet moving forwards ever so slightly.

"Now Colonel, I've told you once… I'll kill her if you don't drop the weapon." And as if to emphasise his point he pressed the barrel of the gun into her forehead, causing her to wince and cry out.

Jack's eyes locked with Sam's. His eyes held so much pain and grief that just seeing him look at her like that caused tears to well in her eyes.

Sam tried to struggle against him but he just pressed the gun to her forehead with even more force. "Don't even try to escape or I'll kill you Major… and then I'll kill your boyfriend." Then he directed his gaze at Jack again. "Now… put… down… the gun."

Jack wanted to kill this man more than he had ever wanted to kill anyone in his whole life… wanted to empty every last bullet in the cartridge into the son of a bitch… but not at the expense of Sam's life. He couldn't fire at the man due to the way he held Sam against his body and Jack knew that any shot he fired would hit her first.

Jack looked at Sam, begging for forgiveness as he bent down."

"No Jack! Don't… NO!" Sam yelled as he placed his gun on the floor.

"I'm sorry Sam." He whispered as he straightened back up.

"Now kick the gun towards me." He told Jack.

Jack placed his foot next to the gun and he kicked it so it slid towards him, the sound of the metal scraping the concrete almost like a sound of defeat.

"Thank you." He spoke with a cruel menace in his voice and with no warning moved the gun from her forehead and fired at Jack.

"NO!!!!" Sam screamed. Her insides flaring, feeling as though her body had been ripped apart. "JACK NO!" She screamed and tried to free herself as she saw Jack fall to the floor.

Without warning there was a second gunshot and his grip loosened on her as he fell to the floor. She turned and saw Daniel standing by the open door of Teal'c's SUV and pointing a gun.

Now she was free from his grip Sam ran over to Jack and nearly collapsed to the floor beside him, her knees feeling weaker with every step she took towards him.

He was lying face down on the ground and Sam grasped his shoulder and rolled him over towards her, his body seemed heavy.

"Jack… Jack…" Sam begged.

His face showed no sign of movement, his body still. She pressed her hand to his chest and felt something wet and warm. She lifted her hand and turned it over. "Oh god" Sam whispered, her hand was covered in his blood. Sam placed her hands on either side of his face.

"Jack, Jack… please wake up."

Thoughts ran through her mind, things she hadn't said to him, things she hasn't done. She couldn't think straight, she felt light headed and wanted to vomit. Jack was lying in her arms bleeding and she felt like she couldn't do anything about it. She couldn't help the man she loved, the man who had gone to the ends of the earth and beyond to find her when she had been lost.

"Come on Jack, please, I need you… please" Tears were rolling down her cheeks as she cradled his body to her.

She felt helpless, she didn't know whether to scream, to cry, her breaths were coming in short gasps as she clung to him, her world becoming darker as she felt her head becoming heavy and her body drooping.

As Daniel came running over he was met with a sight that made his blood run cold. Just as he slowed to a stop Sam passed out over Jack's lifeless body.

OK, I'm SO sorry about the lack of update. I have been so busy with exams, coursework deadlines, illness and so much other stuff it's just knocked me for six.

I'm gonna try and work on the last chapter(s) ASAP (who knows you might even get another update today!)

I'm on antibiotics at the moment and am trying to take it easy the next few days, so I'm gonna do so by reading (and hopefully writing) as much fanfic as possible.

Love to you all!!!

xxxx


	12. Chapter 12 Confessions

She tried to open her eyes, but they felt so heavy that she found it difficult. She had no idea where she was but her senses were being assaulted by a barrage of noises and smells that she recognised. The beeping and the sickly clean smell that surrounded her made her want to curl into a ball until they went away.

She tried to piece together anything that could help her comprehend where she was or what had happened to her. Everything inside her mind seemed to be a blur but she forced herself to stop thinking, take a breath and relax. Her years of military training had taught her to try and assess the situation when awaking before actually letting anyone know you were awake.

She slowly managed to open her eyes and the brightness that greeted her made her want to close them again, but she forced herself to keep them open and gradually they adjusted. She scanned the room without moving her head and her eyes fell on the sleeping form in the chair beside her.

'Daniel?'

She was about to speak, call out to him when her mind came together and a vision of Jack's lifeless body and his blood on her hands came rushing at her.

"Jack" she choked out a sob so quiet it was barely audible.

She didn't know where she drew the strength from but she pulled her body upright and bent forwards, placing her head on the bed in between her knees, running her hands through her hair. She felt something sharp tug at her hand and looked to see a drip stuck to it. She grasped at it with her free hand and yanked it away from her skin.

She looked down and pulled the heart beat monitors from her chest causing the heart monitor to flat line and swung her legs out from under the sheets that covered her, placing her feet to the ground.

Daniel had been roused by the sudden and dejectedly all too familiar noise of a flat lining heart monitor. He saw Sam sitting on the edge of the bed trying to stand and as she did so her legs buckled and Daniel was out of the chair in a flash.

She pushed herself up off the bed and just as she did so she felt her legs give way but instead of meeting the floor she was grasped in a strong embrace.

"Easy Sam, easy"

"No, Jack… I have to… where is he" Sam gasped.

Daniel moved her backwards and placed her back onto the bed as two nurses rushed into the room having been alerted by the flat line.

"It's okay. Can you give us a minute." He asked them.

The nurses nodded and left the room.

"Where's Jack?" Sam asked.

Sam couldn't bear the way Daniel was looking at her, the emotions she could see in his eyes were more than she could handle. He opened his mouth to speak but then closed it again.

"no… please… don't say it…" Sam's voice broke as a sob escaped from her.

"He's in a coma Sam… the doctor's say…" Daniel paused, taking in a breath. "…they say he won't last the night."

Another sob managed to choke its way from her throat.

"I'm so sorry Sam." Daniel moved forwards and enveloped her and she clung to him, sobbing her heart out.

She managed to get her crying under some semblance of control and pulled back.

"I need to see him."

Daniel simply nodded and walked over to the door where a wheelchair was waiting.

"No… I'll… I'll walk. I just need a hand."

Daniel didn't speak as he walked over to her and placed his arm around her waist. She placed her feet on the floor but with Daniel's support she felt steadier.

As they walked along the corridor Sam spoke quietly.

"Why aren't we at the SGC?"

"When I saw Jack's car I called 911. The EMT arrived a few minutes after Jack had been shot. I asked them if they could transport him to Cheyenne Mountain but they said he needed a hospital fast and that Colorado Medical Centre was only five minutes away."

Sam simply nodded. When they stopped outside a door to a private room Sam saw Teal'c, Dr Frasier and General Hammond all seated outside. None of them spoke… they didn't need to.

Daniel took a breath. "Do you want me to come in with you?"

Sam shook her head, her gaze transfixed on the door.

"I need to do this alone."

She stepped forward and placed her hand on the door knob bracing herself. She didn't know if she could face this… but she knew she had to… for Jack. He had saved her… and now it was her turn to save him.

She leant back against the door, her weight clicking it shut. She let out a breath she didn't realise she'd been holding.

There he was… lying on the bed… so deathly still it made her want to close her eyes and not open them again until he awoke and spoke to her telling her to open her eyes… but if the doctor's were right… that would never happen again.

But what did the doctor's know? She wasn't going to let this happen. They were stronger than this… everything they had gone through over the past couple of days, hell over the past seven years, made their love stronger than anything…and she knew that if she could reach him they way he had reached her when she was so lost inside of herself that she could bring him back to her, back into her arms where she could hold him and never let go.

She walked over to the bed and her breath caught in her throat. He was so pale, so lifeless. She placed her hand to his face, cupping his cheek. He was colder than she remembered, she closed her eyes at the memories that assaulted her, the feel of Jack's body against hers, the way his skin felt so warm when their bodies were entwined.

For some reason a verse from a poem she had studied in high school came to her,

'But, though kind Time may many joy's renew,

There is one greatest joy I shall not know

Again, because my heart for loss of You

Was broken, long ago'

God, if someone had told her back then that the poem she had been studying would be fitting to her later in life… that she would be sitting my the bedside of her very own soldier, a man who she had shared so much with, had seen so much with, had travelled to other planet's with… a man she loved so much but whose life was slowly fading before her…

She sat on the edge of the bed and pulled one leg up underneath her, leaving her other leg dangling off the side of the bed and leant over him.

"Jack…"

Nothing

She took a breath knowing that if ever there was a time she was going to really let herself go, one moment to pour out all the emotions inside of her, one single moment in time to reveal everything she felt for him, this was it.

"Jack… I need you to wake up… I can't go on without you… you're everything to me. You're my heart, my soul… if you die, I'll die with you. Every time you walk into a room, every time you look at me my heart skips a beat. Every time you touched me, even if it were a fleeting brush of your hand on mine or… god… whenever you held me in your arms… I never felt safer than when you held me… I knew that you were always there for me. When I got lost, you found me… I can't go on, knowing I'm never going to see you again, never going to feel your gaze upon me, never going to feel the touch of your lips, your fingers, your body, your breath on my skin."

Sam took a breath and paused for a moment blinking away the tears that had formed in her eyes.

"I know it sounds weird, but whenever I was with you, I felt like I did when I was alone. When I was alone, I felt like I wasn't trying to prove myself to anyone, I could be myself… and that's how I felt when I was with you… you are the only man I could ever be myself with. The only man I could ever love so completely it scared me. You're with me every moment of every day; you're in my dreams at night, my fantasies… I can't imagine a future without you. Last night, when I remembered who I was… I didn't see images of my life before the SGC… I remembered you… everything that we had shared… because you're my life… my love…"

She bent forwards, her lips a mere few millimetres away from his, tears fell from her eyes onto his face.

"I need you to wake up Jack, to come back to me…because I can't go on without you… I love you."

Sam closed the distance between them with a soft, tender lingering kiss.

Across the room a figure stood in the shadows, tears running down his cheeks.

"God Sam… my Sam."

He took in a shaky breath.

"I can't leave her… I need her too much…I love her… so much."

"Then go back to her."

"How?"

"Just close your eyes, and let yourself feel her."

He turned to the figure beside him.

"Thanks Oma."

"Your journey is not yet over Jack O'Neill… together you will be the strongest warriors of mankind this galaxy has ever seen… together… you can defeat the Goa'uld.'

He looked at her with a small grin. "What, no cryptic 'if you immediately know the candlelight is fire, then the meal was cooked a long time ago' kinda speech?"

Oma smiled. "I will tell you this. Your journey is just beginning."

Jack tilted his head, still smiling. "That sounds familiar."

Oma simply ducked her head smiling as Jack looked back to the scene on the bed.

He closed his eyes and felt himself fading.

She didn't want to break the kiss, wanted to cling onto this moment for all of eternity.

She could taste the salt from her tears as they trickled down her cheeks and a few slipped to where her lips met his.

She gasped softly as she felt a hand wind into her hair and Jack's mouth suddenly but oh so softly capture her bottom lip in-between his own.

She pulled back only a fraction to see Jack's deep brown eyes staring up at her.

"Hey" he whispered.

Who knew that a word so simple, so innocent could the most beautiful sound in the world?

"Oh god, Jack" Sam sobbed.

She captured his lips again, Jack holding her there while he ran his tongue across her lips, parting them and delving his tongue into her mouth. Their tongues caressed and stroked each other and Jack pulled back so he could brush his lips back and forth across her parted ones in a caress so soft and slick it made her moan in pleasure.

Sam placed her hand on the side of his face, her thumb in front of his ear and the rest of her hand in his hair she sought a deeper caress of his mouth, her tongue mating with his.

Jack pulled back, resting his forehead against hers.

"God I love you Sam, so much. You brought me back… I could hear you and I knew I needed to get back to you… I love you." Jack whispered breathlessly.

"I love you Jack."

She sat up and as she did so Jack spoke.

"Help me up here."

Sam smiled as she helped him sit up in the bed and immediately Jack wrapped her in a one armed embrace and Sam clung to him like a life raft, somehow in amongst the emotions and desperation managing not to crush his injured arm that now resided in a sling. Jack's lips were in the crook of her neck and he ran his hand through her hair.

Breathing out a contented sigh he spoke "I love you."

He reached for her hand which was languidly stroking his neck. He took her hand in his and interlaced their fingers. He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her palm. Her other hand continued to caress his neck.

Sam leant forwards and kissed his hairline where a cut had been stitched up and then moved to place a kiss on the scar over his right eyebrow, the top of his cheek bone, the corner of his mouth and finally his lips.

Their kisses were passionate, desperate and all consuming and left them breathless.

"Just wait until I get you home." Sam grinned.

"Hey… injured man here… you'll have to be gentle with me." Jack smiled.

They kissed once more before Sam rose from the bed and walked over to the door.

Sam reached the door and opened it, walking out into the corridor.

All her friends stood up and feared the worst when they saw her tear streaked and flushed cheeks.

She looked at them and smiled, taking a breath.

"He's awake"

The sighs of relief were intermingled with the thanks sent to any god that may actually exist. Daniel swept her up into a hug whispering, "Are you okay?"

She pulled back and nodded. Everyone took it in turns to embrace Sam before filing into Jack's room. After a minute or so of warm embraces she was alone in the corridor feeling like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She turned around and stood in the door way. Jack was sitting up with the others surrounding him asking if he was okay and how he felt. Sam leant against the door frame, a soft smile on her lips.

Jack turned to look at her and smiled warmly.

The others fell silent, inwardly elated about not only how Jack had survived but that he and Sam had finally come to their senses. It's a shame that all it took was a kidnapping, a car crash and a near death experience to make them realise it. The thing was, these things had all happened over the past seven years on numerous occasions… so what was it that had finally made their resolve snap, finally made them realise how much they needed each other?

Janet cleared her throat.

"Okay, I think we should leave these patients to get their rest."

The others were in silent agreement and all wished them both well telling them they'd be back tomorrow to check up on them. Janet was the last to leave the room and whispered to Sam as she left,

"and I mean i rest /i "

The doctor winked at Sam who laughed softly before the door was closed and she and Jack were alone once again.

"C'mere" Jack spoke softly and Sam walked over to the other side of the bed and climbed on so Jack could wrap his uninjured arm around her. It wasn't soon before they succumbed to the inevitable sleep they both needed and that was how the nurse found them 10 minutes later after being informed by Janet that the Colonel was awake. She wanted to wake him to check his vitals but decided that could wait an hour and she left the room silently, leaving the couple wrapped in each others embrace, deep asleep, oblivious to the outside world… but together none the less.


End file.
